Ask for Help

Asking for help can be difficult for some caregivers, but having other people lighten the load can be a great relief. Ask close family members if they are available to assist you by covering a caregiving shift, running errands, or cooking a meal for your loved one.

Even the smallest bit of help can go a long way toward getting you some much-needed relief. Not only will it be good for you to get a break, but your loved one will enjoy seeing other members of the family and close friends too.

Get Enough Rest & Eat Well

One of the most important things for a caregiver to do is get plenty of rest, and eat nutritious food. Poor sleep and eating habits have a cumulative effect of robbing both the body and mind of the energy needed to function effectively.

Take the time to eat nutritious meals, and set a sleep schedule that will provide a good night’s sleep each day. Not only will the quality of your caregiving go up, but you’ll also feel more energetic, and able to perform your duties over the long run.

Seek Help from a Mental Health Professional

Many people have found that working with a mental health professional is a great way to cope with the stress and worry associated with caregiving. Talking about your feelings, concerns, and the effect caregiving has on your own life can lift a lot of weight from your shoulders.

Through this process, you will learn that many caregivers feel the same way you do. This kind of support helps you feel less isolated, and reassured that others are going through the same experience too.

Self Care for Care Givers 

Being a caregiver for an aging loved one is an incredibly selfless thing to do. However, the responsibilities that come with it can be stressful and challenging.

By realizing your own limits, asking for help, taking a break when needed, getting enough sleep, and eating nutritious food, you will be in the best position to provide outstanding care for your loved one.

Be There for Them

Many family caregivers tend to be emotionally strong people. They seem to be able to successfully handle a lot of stress and responsibilities with regard to caring for an older loved one. While these individuals are perceived to be superheroes, the truth is that they are just human beings like everyone else.

Family caregivers need all the support they can get. Ask your family member what you can do to help relieve the stress of their daily activities. Stay in touch with phone calls, write a card, or take them to lunch as a way to show them how much you care. Make sure they know how much the family appreciates everything they do.

Lighten the Load by Helping

In many families, the task of caring for a loved one often falls to a specific person. If this is the case in your family, see what can be done to help the primary caregiver with their day to day responsibilities.

Whether it be by assisting with cooking, cleaning, laundry or other essential tasks, even the smallest amount of help can go a long way in making caregiving duties less stressful.

Offer Information on Support Groups

Many organizations exist that are devoted to supporting family caregivers. Spending time with people who are also experiencing the challenges of home caregiving can be therapeutic, and a great relief for those who feel isolated.

Most major cities have these types of support groups, with many of them being accessible today on Zoom or over the internet.

Provide Some Financial Help

Statistics from a 2021 AARP study shows that up to 78% of home caregivers experience financial difficulties as a result of their responsibilities with an older loved one.

If this is the case in your family, providing some financial help can make the difference between remaining as a caregiver, or having to return to work.

Some families have used crowd funding services like Go Fund Me to raise money for the financial shortfalls of a caregiver.

Ensure They Are Caring for Themselves

At home caregivers are usually so busy meeting the needs of a loved one, they forget about their own self-care requirements.

Be sure to remind the caregiver in your family that they must take care of themselves, both physically and emotionally. Otherwise, they will be unable to meet the needs of the loved one they are assisting.

Encourage the caregiver to take the time needed to get enough sleep, eat healthfully, and take mental breaks when needed. This will not only help them stay healthy and balanced, but also improve the quality of care their loved one is receiving.

Independence at Home with Assistance

There may come a time for a senior when they are still able to live at home, but require assistance from family members with certain tasks. If an older loved one becomes unsteady on their feet, they might ask family members to install safety bars in the bathroom, or at the top of the stairs.

Should driving become an issue, family members can go grocery shopping for their loved one, or take them to doctor appointments. The amount and type of assistance will vary, dependent on each individual’s needs.

Moving in with Family Members

In time, a loved one may require more assistance than can be provided in their own home. Many adult children invite their mom or dad to live with them, so care can be provided more sufficiently, and conveniently for everyone involved.

This usually happens when a loved one can no longer manage certain tasks themselves, including meal preparation, laundry, or taking medication.

Residing in An Assisted Living Community

For some seniors, the time comes when it is best to transition to an Assisted Living community. A key indicator for the need of this level of care is when a person requires assistance with what are known as the Activities of Daily Living (ADLs). ADLs include eating, bathing, using the washroom, dressing, and moving about.

Once a senior needs regular assistance with the Activities of Daily Living, it becomes extremely difficult for family members to provide care at home.

Assisted Living communities provide round the clock, top quality care for residents, and gives them the opportunity to make new friends, and engage in a wide variety of fulfilling activities.

Memory Care

If a loved one begins to experience a decline in their cognitive abilities, a Memory Care community is a great option for their continued care.

Memory Care communities specialize in caring for residents who are living with Alzheimer’s disease, or other forms of dementia. Specially trained staff are always available to meet the physical and emotional needs of Memory Care residents.

These communities also put great emphasis on helping residents engage in meaningful activities which bring meaning and fulfillment to their lives.

The Level of Care that is Needed

A typical sticking point among adult children with regard to caring for an aging parent is determining how much care is actually needed in order to meet their needs. Some members of the family might prefer to keep their parent at home to age in place, while other siblings may insist that a Senior Living community is the best setting to meet their needs.

A good way to find resolution for this situation is to have all adult children sit down together, and calmly define exactly what their parent’s specific needs are.

 An Unbalanced Distribution of Care Duties Among Siblings

It is fairly common in families to have certain siblings bear more of the responsibility of caring for an aging parent than others. This dynamic can cause a lot of tension among adult children, and bring forth negative emotions such as resentment, anger, and bitterness.

One of the most detrimental ways of handling such a situation is to ignore it, or have certain siblings fail to express their true feelings about the mismatched share of care responsibilities.

Resisting Childhood Behavior Patterns

Everyone’s goal for an aging parent should be to provide the best and most appropriate level of care for their loved one. Sometimes in stressful situations, adult siblings can fall back into childhood behavior patterns that are dysfunctional or unhealthy.

Intense dynamics among siblings can sometimes derail certain individual’s ability to be fully helpful. Each adult child should be watchful that they do not revert to childhood behavior patterns that could negatively affect the family’s ability to care for a parent.

Seeking Professional Help

A qualified social worker or counselor can be a great help to adult children with regard to proactively resolving family issues. They can also assist in making sure all of the siblings remain focused on the primary goal of providing the best care for their parent.

These professionals are trained and experienced in managing complex emotional situations, and can help family members keep their interactions with each other positive, and constructive.

Mind Stimulating Puzzles or Games

According to Harvard Medical School, memory and thinking skills in seniors can be improved by engaging in mind stimulating puzzles or games. Ask your loved one what kind of games or puzzles they enjoy.

Whether it be crossword puzzles, numbers games like Sudoku, or the ever popular Wordle, your loved one will enjoy the challenges they provide. Puzzles or games are also a great way to engage the entire family to spend some quality time together.

An LED Magnifying Glass

If your loved one has a hard time seeing fine print, or could use some help looking at something more closely, a magnifying glass with an LED light is a great gift.

There are many styles to choose from, with magnifying strengths ranging from 3X, 5X, and 10X. Both handheld products and desk mounted magnifying glasses are available and reasonably priced.

Whether your loved one is reading, sewing, or working on a project, the built in LED light will brighten everything for them to see as clearly as possible.

A Long Handle Back Scratcher

It may sound a bit silly to give a long handled back scratcher as a gift to your loved one, but they sure come in handy when needed! When a pesky itch can’t be reached, a back scratcher is worth its weight in gold!

These handy devices come in a wide variety of styles, from basic wood ones, to metal in a variety of colors. Find one that your loved one would best enjoy using.

A Gift Card

As the old expression goes, a gift card fits everyone perfectly. Treat your loved one to a gift card from their favorite restaurant, and enjoy a great meal together. If they like to shop online, a gift card to favorite retailer will also be greatly appreciated.

Universally accepted gift cards from companies like VISA can be used virtually anywhere in the world that accepts a credit card for payment. One of the best things about a gift card is that they allow your loved one to pick a present that they choose for themselves.

Scented Soaps & Lotions

Make every day of the week a little like a spa day by giving your loved one a variety of scented soaps or lotions to enjoy. These products are calming, and their soothing fragrances are a treat for the senses.

There is nearly an endless variety of scented soaps and lotions available today, made from oatmeal, tree tea oil, lavender, lemon, and many other fragrances.

What is a Healthcare Proxy?

A health care proxy is an individual authorized by someone to make medical decisions for them should they become unable to do so. The proxy is given authority through the execution of certain legal documents.

Who Can Serve as a Medical Proxy for a Senior?

In most states, the minimum age to be a healthcare proxy is 18. However, the age requirement can vary from state to state, so it’s important for a senior to check the specific laws in their area. The person chosen to be a healthcare proxy must also be of sound mind, and capable of making important decisions regarding their duties.

What Decisions Can a Healthcare Proxy Make?

A senior can choose which types of decisions a healthcare proxy can make on their behalf. Controls can be put in place to regulate the authority a proxy has to match the wishes of the senior. Typically, the range of duties for a healthcare proxy can include:

• Choosing healthcare providers and hospitals.

• Deciding on what medical care, surgeries or treatments are done.

• Overseeing medical records.

• Decisions regarding autopsies, organ donation, and the disposition of a person’s remains at the time of death.

What to Look for in a Healthcare Proxy

Because making healthcare decisions on another’s behalf is a highly sensitive issue, it’s important that a senior finds a person that is trustworthy, and knowledgeable about their wishes, and can be counted on to make decisions that are 100% in alignment with those wishes.  

A senior should have very detailed conversations with any potential healthcare proxy candidates to ensure they are willing to adhere to the senior’s requirements.

Executing the Healthcare Proxy Document

A qualified attorney, knowledgeable in family law, can draw up a Durable Power of Attorney for Healthcare document that specifies a senior’s wishes. The agreement must be signed by both the senior and the proxy, and be notarized.

Just as importantly, it is critical that the healthcare proxy keep a notarized copy of the agreement accessible at all times.

Falls

One of the most serious threats to an older person’s health are injuries resulting from a fall. Not only can falls cause bruising, but also more serious problems like head injuries and broken bones.

In many cases, falls can be prevented at home by providing your loved one with a cane, or walker to use while moving around. Installing adequate lighting around the house, putting grab bars in the bathroom, and clearing walking paths from obstructions are also great ways to avoid accidents.

Certain Illnesses or Conditions

Certain physical ailments can also cause unexplainable bruising in older people, such as clotting disorders, liver disease, diabetes, or anemia.

If you think your loved one might have an underlying medical condition that is not being addressed, take them to the doctor right away. Simple blood testing can help to figure out if bruising is being caused by an untreated illness.

Poor Lifestyle Habits or Nutrition

Lifestyle choices such as smoking can cause excessive bruising, as it reduces the body’s ability to produce collagen, a key factor in bruise prevention. Nutrition can also play a role in bruising. Be sure that your loved one is getting plenty of Vitamin C in their food or through supplements, which boosts collagen production.

Minimizing Bruising in Seniors

Helping your loved one minimize or prevent bruising is critical to their overall well-being. By understanding how medications affect bruising, preventing falls, looking for signs of elder abuse, discovering untreated illness with the help of a doctor, and addressing poor lifestyle or nutritional choices, you will play a very positive role in their long-term health.

The compassionate and knowledgeable team at Frontier Senior Living has helped many families find the perfect Senior Living community to meet their loved one’s specific needs. 

If you would like to learn more about our services, we cordially invite you to visit one of our wonderful communities, take a tour, and speak to our staff.

Walking Instability

Many seniors fall because they can no longer walk with stability. If this is occurring with your loved one, encourage them to use a cane or walker when moving around the house. A change as simple as this can make the difference between staying safe, and suffering a debilitating fall.

It’s also critically important that your loved one uses their walker or cane every time they get up. Do what you can to help them to get in the habit of doing this.

Unsafe Footwear Choices

While wearing slippers at home can be very comfortable, this type of footwear can be quite dangerous. By design, many slippers are loose fitting, so they can be easily put on or taken off. Because they do not provide much support to the foot and ankle, slippers are not a good choice for seniors who are concerned about falling.

Instead of slippers, encourage your loved one to wear supportive, non-slip shoes. This kind of footwear will not only minimize the chance of a fall, but also provide more foot and ankle stability.

Throw Rugs & Other Trip Hazards

Throw rugs and other loose objects on floors are a major cause of falls for seniors. Take a look at each room in your loved one’s home and remove, any objects that could cause a fall. If there are throw rugs you want to keep in place, secure them with carpet tape.

Lack of Safety Equipment

Safety equipment in the home can make all the difference when it comes to helping your loved one prevent a fall. Grab bars in bathrooms, handrails in hallways, a lift chair for those who have difficulty climbing stairs, and high seat commodes are just a few examples of the safety equipment that is available today. Assess each room of your loved one’s home to see what safety equipment would be beneficial for their specific situation.

Trouble Getting Out of Bed

There are a number of adjustable beds for the home on the market today. Unlike a hospital bed, these beds look and feel like a standard bed, but the mattress can be adjusted up and down, or be raised at the head.

If your loved one has trouble getting out of bed, an adjustable mattress could be very helpful. Raising the height of the mattress just a few inches will work wonders for their mobility.

Adapting Their Home

According to the American Stroke Association, more than 75% of stroke patients will fall in the home within 6 months. It is crucial that you adapt your loved one’s home so a fall risk can be minimized. Make your loved one’s safety a top priority.

Evaluate the living areas of the home, and eliminate any trip hazards. Another great way to keep them safe is to install grab bars, non-slip mats, bright lighting, and other safety equipment in the home. Emphasize to your loved one that they must always use their cane or walker when moving around the house.

Encourage Daily Movement

Helping your loved one stay physically active in line with their capabilities will be very important during their recovery journey. Any movement they are capable of will be a great help in keeping them as limber as possible. Work with your loved one’s physical therapy team to determine what kind of exercise is best suited for them.

Provide Nutritious Meals

One of the most important things you can do for a loved one who is recovering from a stroke is to ensure they are eating nutritious meals in order to gain strength and endurance.

Help them prepare meals that are well balanced, and promote health and healing. While there is nothing wrong with a treat once in a while, eating healthfully will be the best way to supply the energy they need to fuel their recovery efforts.

Help Them Stay Mentally Alert

Encourage your loved one to read books, watch movies, do puzzles, or any other activity that will stimulate their cognitive abilities. This will help them in their effort to not only try and regain what was lost as a result of the stroke, but also maintain their cognitive function for the future.

Encourage Them to Stay Optimistic

Do all you can to help your loved one stay positive and optimistic about their stroke recovery journey. One’s mental attitude about adverse circumstances can play a significant role in maximizing the success of the recovery process.

It may seem difficult at times to help keep them motivated to persevere, but their optimism about the situation will be extremely beneficial.

Follow Their Medical Care Plan

In addition to providing the best home care possible for your loved one, be sure they are committed to following their doctor’s medical and therapy plan for them.

Fatigue & Low Energy

A debilitating sense of fatigue can be a powerful sign that someone is depressed. Depression can interfere with sleep patterns, which leads to drowsiness and a lack of energy during day time hours. Talk to your loved one about whether they are having sleeping problems, and contact their doctor to see what solutions may be available.

Attention Issues

Depression can also affect a senior’s ability to focus on activities they once enjoyed. You may notice that your loved one is having trouble starting or completing projects, or becomes distracted while having a conversation.

Anyone can have a bad day, but if you sense your loved one is having consistent attention problems, talk to their doctor about it.

Self Harm Thoughts

It’s a sad fact that 18% of the suicides committed in the U.S. are by seniors. Many older people have a difficult time coping with changes in health, finances, a declining number of friends, and other factors that can lead to depression.

If you hear your loved one say things like they don’t want to live any longer, or the world would be better off without them, it is time to take direct action to get them some help. Contact their doctor right away to see if there is medication or therapy available that would be beneficial.

Depression Screenings for Seniors

Your loved one’s doctor can arrange for them to be screened for depression. Working with mental health professionals is a great way to gain insight into what might be going on with them. A depression screening can be tailored to your loved one’s exact needs, and can determine what type of help may be needed. Contact their doctor for more information.